Accentuate the Positive

“You've got to accentuate the positive, Eliminate the negative Latch on to the affirmative” (Johnny Mercer / Harold Arlen)

Is your glass half full or half empty? Life happens and how we handle what we are served can make or break us. Given the choice of laughing or crying, I opt for laughing. I try to find humor in a situation and generally don’t have a difficult time, it is out there. Trying to take a situation and put a positive spin on it is not easy, I am the first to admit that. Adapting a positive attitude does help resolve an unpleasant situation in a productive way.

Are you able to reframe your thinking about the situation? "When you find yourself focusing on the foreground of a problem or a crisis, take a step back and look at it in the context of the big picture of your life," says Dr. Seaward. "Doing so helps you realize that in many areas of your life things are going well." From www.reliantbh.com. According to www.mayoclinic.com , some self-talk stems from logic and reason and the more negative self-talk crops up due to lack of information.

"When you're feeling as if nothing is going right, stop and make a list of all the things you're grateful for or take for granted," says Brian Seaward, PhD. "Start with simple things, like being able to see and breathe. Then move on to personal things, such as family members and your job. Don't stop until you reach 100 items." OK, counting 100 items can take some time, start small, aim for 5 or 10 items.

There are some possible health benefits to a positive attitude and those include:
· Lower rates of depression
· Improved resistance to the common cold
· Better ability to cope with stress and other problems

There is no clear-cut reason why but thoughts are that people with a positive outlook tend to have healthier lifestyles.
· They follow a healthy diet
· Engage in physical activity
· Have lower rates of smoking and alcohol consumption

Self talk – negative or positive?

At some point we have all been excited about a job interview, the job of our dreams and you finally get called for an interview.

Do you pump yourself up and strut and say, I am going to get this job, I deserve this job, and I am qualified for this job. Or are you thinking I know I am going to blow this interview? I hope I don’t say anything stupid. Why would they want to hire me?

Being positive or negative comes through in your body language, gestures and even your responses to interview questions.

“A good rule to follow in self-talk is to talk to yourself the way you want others to talk to you”. From www.reliantbh.com. Here’s another good thought, from www.mayoclinic.com, “Don’t say anything to yourself that you wouldn’t say to anyone else” or “don’t say anything you wouldn’t say to your grandmother”.

By focusing on your weaknesses you are not helping yourself to find solutions to the problem at hand. It leaves you feeling victimized and powerless. Thinking positively helps you to focus on your strengths which allows you to find creative solutions to problems and be pro-active.

OK, so how can I be more positive?

According to Dr. Seaward, anger is a result of unmet expectations in daily life. Often, we think we have control of a situation and we do not. By lowering your expectations and rolling with the punches you can reduce your anger. It will also help keep your blood pressure down.

· Schedule some time to “be happy”. Sounds corny, I know. Set aside a little time, even if only 10 minutes and do something you enjoy. Set a kitchen timer if you don’t have much time. I do that in the mornings when there are 5 or 10 minutes where I can actually sit and have my coffee and watch the morning news (well, that part is not necessarily thrill inducing given the state of the world BUT, sitting and sipping my coffee for 10 minutes is sheer heaven!)
· Dealing with problems? Wallowing on all that is wrong will keep you stuck in the muck. Focus on your strengths; take the bull by the horns. This empowers you and helps you move forward. Problems don’t go away through wishful thinking or griping about them. You have to be the one to take charge and make things happen.
· Follow a healthy lifestyle: physical activity and a healthy diet. Manage your stress.
· Smile, it feels good and when someone smiles back, doesn’t that make it worthwhile? Maybe you made THEIR day.

Negative people

Try to avoid negative people in your life, if you can’t avoid them, cut back on the time you spend with them. There are people who never have anything good to say about anyone or anything. It gets old listening to them. They will wear you down and sap all your energy. I have my own problems and so do you. Life is too short.

Choose your words and thoughts

“Negative thought: I never do anything right.
Evidence: None.
Positive thought: I do plenty of things right.

Negative thought: My accomplishment is not enough. Anybody could have done it.
Evidence: None.
Positive thought: I still accomplished something and I deserve to be proud.”
From www.reliantbh.com.

Remember, it takes 21 days to change a habit. You won’t wake up tomorrow morning singing Zip A Dee Doo Dah. You can begin by practicing more positive self talk and looking at things in a different way. If you hold a globe in your hands and turn it, you see different countries. Try looking at a situation differently. It makes a world of difference.

"Zip-A-Dee-Doo-Dah"
Music by Allie WrubelLyrics by Ray Gilbert© 1945 Walt Disney Music Company

Zip-A-Dee-Doo-Dah Zip-A-Dee-A
My oh my, what a wonderful day
Plenty of sunshine heading my way
Zip-A-Dee-Doo-DahZip-A-Dee-A
Mister bluebird on my shoulder
It's the truth
It's actual
Everything is satisfactual
Zip-A-Dee-Doo-Dah Zip-A-Dee-A
Wonderful feelingWonderful day